25 May 2007

The Secrets To Gaining Supreme Personal Confidence

Developing and maintaining your self confidence is as important as any technical skill you might possess in your job or business. Often you might find your self confidence and belief will sway others to your side. So it is a powerful tool to have in an interview scenario. But what is ultimate or supreme confidence? And how can you measure it if possible? Well it is rather difficult to measure such, however i have come to the realisation that you can determine personal confidence through a person's character.

You might have heard of this quote before, but i will repeat it here as it is pertinent to this point: "If you lose your wealth, you have lost nothing, if you lose your health, you have lost something, but if you lose your character, you have lost everything". I believe the statement to be somewhat true, though health would be quite high if not the most important. But for the benefit of this discussion, your character is just as significant, i guess it kind of goes to the heart of the matter, or to the heart and soul of the person. And once you have lost that as a person, it is downhill from there with no coming back, unless you get rescued and get some major help.

Some of you might be saying the secret to having self confidence is acquiring lots of money, nice house, nice family and so on, and my answer would be it is not entirely the case, there are 1000s if not millions of people with all the money in the world and still not happy, so how do you explain that? One thing i do believe is that to be successful at anything in life you must have self confidence in your abilities as a person, it has to be unwavering almost indestructable.

The downfall for most people is the envy which they show towards their neighbour(s). When you are envious of someone else it means you are lacking in self confidence, you feel inadequate, low in self esteem and this can affect your morale. So if you were preparing for an interview and have negative thoughts towards another person because of how well they performed, no one gets hurt but you, this type of thinking is negative and self destrcutive. In my opinion it is at the root to most of mankind problems. Instead of us to learn and be inspired from the success of our friends some look for their downfall, how they can better them anyhow, anyway possible. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong in wanting to be better or admiring another person's success but it is the thinking process, the negative thought patterns of some people which is abhorent and only detrimental to themselves in the end. It shows up their true innerself, they lack self esteem and personal confidence.

Some of the people i admire today as having supreme confidence would be people like Sir Richard Branson, Justin Timberlake, P. Diddy, Sir Alan Sugar, John Harrison, Ted Nicholas, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet to name but a few. What these famous and successful people have in common besides all being multi millionaires and billionaires in their own right, is that they have a certain 'care free' attitude as they look to others for inspiration and support. Money has certainly helped them, but i can promise you envy was not a part of their policy, as it would have ate at their self confidence and belief and surely would kept them at the basement of the success ladder. You know they say envy is the root to all evil. It is also the root to people's downfall and lack of confidence.

I will finish with a little story that illustrates the feeling that envy is somewhat in grained most people. I had attended an interview a long time ago for a position as a recruitment consultant for an executive search firm and i got invited to the 2nd stage, i was asked to do a presentation to the group. I proceeded to give my presentation, at the end there were some questions asked. But i remember one of the employees asking me if i would be envious if one of my colleagues was doing better than me in terms of generating results and revenue, ok and reasonable question. But they were not quite prepared for my feedback, in that i said i would certainly not be envious of he or she, why should i be envious, the money? Well, ladies and gentleman, it is the wrong focus, mine would be on learning from the person, watching, observing and listening to what has got them to the top of their field. Envy is a sign of weakness and if you are this way inclined it is something that can be worked on and must be addressed. With regards the story of my 2nd interview and presentation, the company hired me in the end.

So the secrets to achieving supreme confidence is simply developing your inner self, your self thoughts, and banishing all forms of envy, envy is a cancer that eats away at the mind and spirit of a human being.

Until next time.

Femi Yusoof


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